So we all know who these people are. You have stood behind them, near them, or maybe even waited on them. Chances are at one point you may have even BEEN one of them. The more I see them, the more pissed off I get. You know who I am talking about right?
The lazy, selfish people who have to talk on their cell phones while (pick one that applies):
- Ordering food at a fast food restaurant
- Checking out at the supermarket
- Purchasing items at a retail establishment
- Ordering food from their waiter/waitress at a sit-down restaurant
I am sure there are other examples than this, but to me these are the pretty big offenders. Folks, are you so goddamned lazy to put your phone down for 3 freaking seconds while you order? Do you not realize how rude and inconsiderate you are being to both the person waiting on you and the person you are talking to? Really? You don't know what a total dick move that is?
Nothing better than talking to someone on the phone and hearing this:
"Oh yeah I was going to go over to Bob's and...um, Big Mac Large Fries...go for a swim and then...what's that? Oh, Diet Coke too...and we were probably going to go hit a movie...no no, large fries. Yes, large, thanks."
Makes me want to reach through that phone and slap them silly right then and there. Do I need to hear you ordering an item that has a million calories...and then a diet coke? Do I? Not at all! And on the other side, do you think Joe Schmoe behind the counter, making $2.89 an hour after taxes, wearing a horrible outfit with a paper hat and is still years away from getting laid really wants to hear about your boring ass day at Bob's? I am going to bet no. Many times no.
You know what I like? When people actually do this:
"Hey Brian, hold on a few seconds, I am going to order (insert a choice from the list above) and going to put you on hold until I do. Will be right back."
Now that is how you do it, and it doesn't hurt at all, I promise. You see, you don't realize it but when you are yapping away at your sqwak box in a public place, everyone can hear exactly what you are saying, and they really, really don't care. Unless your conversation is a very detailed explanation of your date with Jenna Jameson last night, we don't care. To compound that by not shutting the hell up while placing an order puts it into the downright sin category.
So in order to make this world a better place, for the love of God stop going to Dane Cook comedy shows, stop buying Brittany Spears crap, and put your phone down and on mute/hold when you are placing an order. I guarantee you don't like it when people do it to you, so why do you think you are special to do it to them? Make the world a better place already, will you?
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If this guy orders food looking like this he gets punched in the gut
You can laugh, but this phone can call 1978.
The Metro hates cell phone users. Really, really hates.
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